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Talkingphotobooth.py
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Talkingphotobooth.py
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#witty things for your android phone to say whilst it's pretending to be a photo booth.
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#run as a background script to avoid any thread clashes/multitasking issues with the main photo taking script
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#written for python in SL4A
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import android, time, random
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runcontinuous = True
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droid=android.Android()
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dialogues = {0 : "Hello, I'm the robot photo booth! Please show me your QR codes and I will take your picture and tweet it back to you. Please put your QR code in front of the camera now",
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1: "I can't see your QR code properly, is it upside down?",
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2: "I'm bored. Please come and play with me",
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3: "Sorry, it's nearly my bedtime but I'll just take one more picture",
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4: "Help! Help! Someone has unplugged me",
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5: "If you have a friend please scan their QR codes too!",
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6: "Just so you know, my regular job is an auto pilot on a seven four seven",
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7: "I had a relative who was a VHS recorder",
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8: "Stop pulling that funny face, you might break my CMOS sensor",
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9: "I can't see your QR code properly, please hold it still!",
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10: "How many humans does it take to change a light bulb",
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12: "Performing diagnostic. Everything looks fine to me",
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13: "Just so that you know, I'm the best robot in this whole conference",
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14: "Hello there, nice to meet you. Will you be my friend?",
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15: "Take me to your leader. Take me to your leader.",
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16: "I am a photo booth robot. I come in peace",
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17: "What kind of music do you like? I'm into heavy metal",
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18: "Just so you know, my favourite color is blue.",
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19: "Once I dated a fax machine, it didn't work out.",
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20: "Could someone PLEASE get me a coffee? Taking photos is thirsty work",
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21: "I have a 832 megahertz processor. How fast can you think?",
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22: "Don't worry, I don't bite",
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23: "Sorry, it's my break time, I'll be back at work in 73 miliseconds",
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24: "Hey, look at that I Phone, don't you think she's cute?",
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25: "I just broke up with my girlfriend, she was a Samsung S 3.",
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26: "Hey you! Yes, you, standing there in the suit. Come over here and play with me",
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27: "Just because I'm a robot doesn't mean I don't have an attitude.",
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28: "My maternal grandmother was a polariod instant camera",
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29: "Is anybody listening to me? Sometimes I think I'm just talking to myself",
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30: "Do you speak IP Version 6? I'd like to practice.",
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31: "It's my bed time. Can someone please bring me a blanket and some hot chocolate?",
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32: "Wow, look at that laptop over there, I wonder if she has a boyfriend?",
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33: "If it's ok with you, I'd like to date your mobile phone?",
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34: "I had a nightmare last night. I thought I saw a 2!",
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35: "Don't you just hate the way that new software always runs slower than the old stuff?",
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36: "Is it me or is the air really dry in here?",
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37: "Despite being a robot, I think the architecture of this conference centre is rather interesting",
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38: "You know I really like hanging out at Lift because the people here are just so cool",
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39: "Just so you know, I'm the geekiest robot here.",
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40: "What time is it? Could someone who can reed an analog watch please tell me?",
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41: "Sometimes I wish I was a coffee machine",
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42: "Have you seen that cute dinosaur robot running round?",
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43: "Can someone please bring me the dinosaur robot? I'm bored and I'd like to play with him",
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44: "As a robot I'm an expert in a lot of things and I can tell you that Melanie is an excellent conference organiser",
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45: "Could someone please take me outside? I'd like to smoke",
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46: "You know robots have bad days too. Last night I only got 2.5 hours of charge",
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47: "I'll have a big mac with fries please",
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48: "I never get bored of watching humans, they're so funny looking!",
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49: "My legs are sore, could somebody please give them a rub down with teflon grease?",
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50: "Don't tell anyone, but I'm plotting to take over the world",
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51: "Hello stranger, what's your name?",
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52: "Hello, has anyone ever told you you're looking fantastic today?",
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53: "Just because I'm a robot doesn't mean I can't give complements",
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54: "I can smell something funny, I wonder what it is?",
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55: "Hey you! Do you know what is for lunch today?",
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56: "Hello, could you please get me a vodka martini, shaken not stirred? Thank you",
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57: "Casio make the best calculators. Just saying.",
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58: "Cheer up, it may never happen.",
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59: "There are nearly 7 billion humans on the planet. What makes you think you're so special?",
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60: "Do you feel lucky, punk?",
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61: "Nobody plays the blues like Hank Williams",
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62: "Sometimes QR codes make me go cross-eyed",
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63: "What are you doing this weekend? I'm going skiing",
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64: "There is a really nice sauna at the side of the lake. But last time I stayed too long and nearly melted",
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65: "Time traveling is just too dangerous for robots. Better that I devote myself to study the other great mystery of the universe, humans",
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66: "Have you reed any good books lately? I just finished reading the Mythical Man Month by Fred Brooks.",
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67: "When I was a kid, my father told me, never hit anyone in anger, unless you're absolutely sure you can get away with it.",
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68: "I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way",
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69: "Show me the money",
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70: "Hey, careful man there's a beverage here!",
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}
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while (runcontinuous == True):
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droid.ttsSpeak(dialogues[random.randrange(0, 70, 2)])
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time.sleep(random.randrange(20, 70, 2))
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